Hello all,
Here is one picture. I have approximately 310 more but that is a bit overwhelming. This is an amazing cathedral in St. Petersburg, Russia.
We have been in Oregon for the past few weeks and have had a few days at home now. We are leaving Friday for a Caribbean cruise with my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. I am rooming with his girlfriend and Aaron is rooming with his brother. That may make an interesting post when I get back. :)
For a quick update on me. I actually have not been doing well. I have LOST weight (usually I gain about a half a pound a day on cruises), I am not sleeping, I am breaking out, my blood pressure was high, my sugar was high, I am having constant panic attacks, and I am utterly and desperately depressed. These symptoms have been going on for a few years but have really gotten worse, a lot worse, in the past couple of months.
We had lunch with J and her family this week and she is doing surprisingly well. We didn't discuss another round, we didn't actually discuss anything baby related. I have no idea if she would even consider transferring the last embryo we have frozen. I know I wouldn't and I don't think I can even ask her to go through all that again. I don't want to go through all that again.
Thank you all for your patience with me. I hope you are all doing well.
3 comments:
What a gorgeous photograph! So when do we get to see the other 300+? j/k! And enjoy your cruise - that should be very interesting. Listen, I doubt anyone would be surprised by your weight loss, and other unpleasant physical/emotional symptoms and feelings. Having had depression and anxiety/panic attacks for a lot of years myself off and on, I know stress not even close to the magnitude you've had can get it going again, and hard. Remember that you won't always feel so crappy. I know that doesn't make you feel better now, but please know we're all here for you. Don't hesitate to email me privately if you just need to vent. Praying so hard for you to get through it and come out the other side stronger than you went in - and you will! {HUG}
I'm so sorry that you're feeling so low. I hope that some time away and some stress relief will help you get back to yourself so that you can figure out where to go from here.
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